gotta give credit where credit is due

I really, really hate to give my parents too much credit for parenting me. Because, honestly, look at me...they didn't do that great of a job, really. But, I must give at least my mother credit for one thing (and in all honestly, besides making me a weird paranoid freak, my dad has taught me some pretty great things, too). The other night, Keith and I were taking a rare moment to talk about our kids (is there anything else talk about? beside the Gamecocks, no!), and Keith was just talking about some of Tiernan's, well, stranger tendencies. I said, "You know what, I gotta say, my mom may have made a TON of mistakes in raising me, but, I gotta give her credit for always, ALWAYS taking my most negative tendencies and turning them around to tell me that one day, if I could use them for something good, I could do great things with them. It usually went something like, "Sarah, one day, God will use that stubbornness to do something great"

And I remember those times she said that. The few times she wasn't beating me with a Bible ;-)

But in all seriousness, I was reminded of that when Keith was talking about how annoying it was when Tiernan just REFUSED to take no for an answer. Or when he kept asking the same question over and over and over and over and just can not wait for the answer. I told him how my mom used to say that, and how it actually meant something to me. It made me, even if just for a moment, think that maybe I did have some potential. Maybe there was something I could do.

I told him, ya know, maybe the same will be for Tiernan. Maybe one day he'll be just as stubborn when fighting for something he knows will help change the world. Or change one person's life. Maybe he'll stand there and not take no for an answer, or not just wait in line while people suffer. Maybe he'll bug the hell out of people till they give him what it takes to make a difference! I believe it. I believe any of my kids can take their annoying little habits and use them for good. Not to sound cheesy, but I'm serious. I want my kids to fight to help people. I want them to make a different, or at least to want to make one. I want them to get in people's faces if that's what it takes. I just want them to use what they have and make it a positive thing.

It won't always be. They will still get on people's nerves. Ours, their future spouses, children, ect. I mean, it gets on Keith's nerves when I'm out there saving the world, but I do it anyway!

But really, I do want my kids to stop whining. Oh how I want them to stop whining. And complaining. And fighting. And stomping their feet. They have some work to do to turn their annoying habits around, but I do believe they can use it to do something good one day.

Tiernan has a lot of passion. I tell him all the time it's the Latin in him! He gets angry, he gets emotional, he gets upset, happy, sad, you name it, he gets it. Very passionate. But he also has a huge hart. He can see when someone is hurting. He wants to help people. Very much. He befriends the underdog, ever single time. He has no desire to be the cool kid's friend, he wants to be friends with the kid who's getting picked on. Is it because he's a saint? No, it's because he's so passionate, and he hates seeing his best friend who doesn't speak English very well getting picked on. So, he becomes his best buddy! I love that about him. I don't care if he is never in the cool crowd, even though before kids, I would have said differently. No parents wants a dork for a kid, but if it takes my son being slightly dorky, like his mother, to help make a difference to another kid, then go for it, my love!

I tell Tiernan all the time how proud of him I am. Not for any in particular, just for being him. I tell all my kids that. I tell them they dont' have to change and be like anyone else. They can make a difference just like they are. Just learn when to fight, and when to step back. When to keep bugging people for what you want to hear, and when it's time to try something different.

My kids will leave home one day, and hopefully go far, far away. And that's another thing my parents prepared us, and themselves, for when we were growing up. And I appreciate that so much. They taught us about other places, all around the world. We had missionaries from just about everywhere in our homes, and that became our lesson for the day (because, yes, we were, ugh home schooled). I learned more from them than from any math book. Do you think I can do a lick of algebra now? No, not a bit. But, I can tell you where countries are that Keith didn't even know existed! And I am rather proud of that!
I want my kids to use their strengths, and strengthen their weaknesses to make a difference. To think about what's outside of themselves and Rock Hill, and South Carolina, and this country. I will finance trips abroad! I will cry at the airport, but push them down the terminal into the plane!

I have a lot of great plans for my kids, and I tell them about them every day! Just the other day, I asked Tiernan if he wanted to learn about Nepal! Now, really, how many parents are as cool as me?!